God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.
These days, serving has such negative connotations; all the word seems to resemble is a list of submitting to commands, demands and constraints. Yet this week, I’ve discovered serving those around me is exactly the opposite; it liberates, drives and exhilarates.
Over the course of the past few days, I have been volunteering leading a children’s group at my church’s holiday club. Now, looking after children has never quite been my strong point, and previously to this week I was quite anxious about the whole ordeal. But why preach about stepping out when I never practise it myself?
Serving has also been another downfall of my faith; I spend far too much time concentrating on myself and working on my self growth rather than humbling myself before others and lifting them up higher. A servant heart was something I always liked the idea of, but never placed into action.
But oh my goodness, never have I experienced something as wonderful as serving. Kneeling down before others and humbling myself has set my heart alive in new ways. In doing so, God created this indescribable warmth and love throughout my living body as I spent my days working with the most beautifully wonderful children in the world. Each day, my face grew wide and warm with the largest smile on my face and each night, I threw myself on my knees and praised God for inspiring me through these outstanding young people in new and beautiful ways.
Serving is something which seems much harder on paper than it is in reality; all you need to do is flee from your pride. Submit and give yourself wholly and you’ll receive everything. This week, God granted me a serving heart that I had always been called to beat, and allowed me to overflow and spread out the love He filled within me over the past few weeks. Now, running on empty, I’m ready to embark on a new adventure and be filled up with more of God’s glory at a series of Christian festivals starting tomorrow. As a result, I will be unable to blog for over a week, but I guarantee you all I will have so much to tell once I’m back before I set out on my second festival.
Lord, thank you so much for allowing me to reach to these children and proclaim Your name. Thank you for setting my heart alight and allowing me to experience you in a brand new way, and preparing me for these coming weeks where I will meet you once again. Please continue to burn this fire inside of me, and continue to allow me to run this race for you.
Thank you time and time again for the amazing opportunities, inspirations experiences you have given me in this past month.
You’re too wonderful for words.
‘To all of the girls who are in a hurry to have a boyfriend or get married, a piece of Biblical advice: “Ruth patiently waited for her love Boaz.”
So while you are waiting on your own Boaz, please don’t settle for any of his relatives: Broke-az, Po-az, Lyin-az, Cheatin-az, Dumb-az, Drunk-az,
Lockedup-az, Goodfornothin-az, Lazy-az and especially his third cousin: Beatinyo-az.
Wait on your Boaz and make sure he respects Yoaz.’
Today, I want to take a minute right here, right now, and not just ask you for something. Instead, I simply wish to thank you. Thank you for everything you have given me, and thank you for inspiring me through the smallest things today.
You’re really amazing. You know that?
Lots of love,
Give me a love which encourages passion over lust,
A love which grants honesty over good intention,
A love which cherishes rather than battles for attention.
Give me a love which encourages, rather than captivates,
A love which inquires, but does not question,
A love which performs protection over obession.
Give me a love which nurtures growth, rather than stunts,
A love which holds, but does not consume,
A love which whispers with a rolling boom.
Give me a love which does not expect, but respects.
Unlike last year, when you left, things were not left in the air. The same things happened, yet the result differed. No longer did your needle thread into my mind. Instead, things were left the way they should be: established, yet open to possibility. Yes, I may come back to the memory and think, but I know that is how it is best left; to remember and be open rather than to dwell and desire.
I’ll miss you, but it won’t break my heart. I’ll think of you, but I won’t cling to you.
This time, I was able to shut the car door and walk away knowing that this was both what I wanted, and what I needed. Though not all of my questions were answered, I quite like it that way.
Some things are just best left how they are.
I have been mocked, I have been ridiculed.
I have been wounded, jaded and hated.
I have been shunned, scorned and disliked, all as a consequence of my great love for God, even by those whom I love more than the world.
But tonight, I stand. I stand above the hurt. I stand above the criticism, the pain and scorn. I proclaim my love for my Jesus Christ, the One who holds my heart higher than anyone else, and knows me more than I know myself.
Tonight, He set me free from my past, my present and anything holding me back from Him. He called me to run this race for Him, even if people jeer on the sidelines.
He’s caused me to fall so deeply in love with Him, I can’t look back. I can’t hold back. I won’t go back.
Tonight, I stand and declare my love for God Almighty.
I love Him, He loves me.
I am free.
I pray this song speaks to you as much as it spoke to me tonight.
As a basic principle in chemistry, molecular bonds must be broken in order for a reaction to occur, and therefore create new bonds.
In simple, smaller things must be broken in order to create bigger and better things.
And this doesn’t apply just to science.
This year has taught me how, in life, people must leave, hearts must bleed, and tears must be shed before something new and wonderful is created. Life is shaken up and deconstructed to its primary components before it is suddenly renewed and transformed into something so much more beautiful than what it once was. Though the pain is devastating and tiresome, the long-term benefits become magnificent and worth the tear shed.
I pray that if you are currently going through hardship, you will soon experience the wonder of God breaking those previous bonds of your life and see him change you into someone who is even more beautiful, and even stronger than before; someone who was previously broken, yet made new.
Things will get better. It’s a matter of science.
Lying here, staring at the comotion of the outside world, I can’t help but express my content with life.
Sunshine streaks the windowpane, casting the light in the deepest and dark crevices and illuminating these areas which had never experienced such brightness before. Particles as small and fragile as dusk are flung into the air, and contort in their own form of rhythmical dance, swirling below the ceiling and forming its own intricate universe of tiny flecks. Before the sun shone, this tiny grains could hardly be seen; they were worthless and meant nothing to the beholder. Yet, now the sun has hurtled these insignificant particles into the atmosphere, they form their own beauty and extravagance when they were previously overlooked.
This single moment reflects my life entirely.
After the months of pain, hardship and crying down the phone, life is so much bigger, brighter and more beautiful than what it used to be. I’m so happy and grateful and blessed, all I can do is marvel at all that I have been granted with. The parts of my life that previously had no relevance are now bursting with excitement and wonder, whilst all those dark shameful places in my heart have been overwhelmed by love.
I’m so content with life, there is nothing I demand or lust for.
All I can do I lie in awe, gasping at this wonderful transformation on my reformed life that spins above my head.